How can I convince my ex that we should homeschool?
I am finally at a place where I can seriously plan to homeschool my son later this year. I have secured a good job where I can work remotely and my mom is nearby to help during the day.
But I need to convince his dad–we have 50/50 custody. Do you have any suggestions to help me get support on this with my ex-husband? He is an ISTJ. And I’m an INFJ.
An ISTJ would be the hardest type of all to convince about homeschooling. Also, I imagine the relationship between an ISTJ and INFJ consists of arguing about who’s right. So he will care a lot about winning this argument.
You will hate me for this: I honestly don’t believe homeschooling is better for a kid who has 50/50 custody. The biggest problem a kid with 50/50 custody has is not school. It’s home. 50/50 custody like 50/50 religion. Two religions means no religion and two homes means no homes. It’s why you and your husband each chose to have one home and make your son have two homes: two homes sucks. Think about it. The only way your son would have a home is if you and your husband each lived half the week in your son’s home and half the week in your own home. Then you and your husband would refer to one home as your son’s. Now there is moms house and dads house but not his house. Language is not just symbolic.
In your son’s case, school is the only stable place in his life. You and your husband have different rules and different expectations. School is more consistent. If you have consistent parenting then homeschool allows the kid more ability to be a kid. Every homeschool family I’ve talked to has one parent in charge of schooling. You and your husband could not do that. Neither of you would give it up to the other person because you both think you know best.
If you have two parents with different approaches and two houses then homeschooling exaggerates the difficulties your son already has as a kid navigating 50/50 custody.